
Eating disorders do not discriminate based upon gender, age, social status, body size, race, or ethnicity. — Jennifer Rollin MSW, LCSW-C
I noticed something off with my teenage daughter when she was 15. She seemed to get thinner each month, and yet when we eat out at buffets, she consumes 3 to 4 plates of food. At home, she also has an appetite. In my mind, if she eats a lot, why is she losing so much weight?
Many of the research and clinical articles are specific to mothers who have daughters with eating disorders. Eating disorders among females remain significantly disproportionate to males at a rate of 9 to 1. — Judy Scheel Ph.D., L.C.S.W., CEDS
Talking to her was of no use. I asked her if she was on a diet because she was losing weight so fast. She shot me this cold look and grits her teeth while her eyebrows narrowed. My daughter told me that she’s not on a diet and that she’s not thin. In fact, her words were – “I look disgusting, mom! Why would you say that I’m thin? Have you seen my belly fat? My thighs? It doesn’t have a gap, mom. All the girls in school have thigh gaps, and I don’t. I’m a freaking pig!” She ran out of the living room and went to her room. Her response stunned me, and I looked at her father. He said that it was teenage hormones, the way she lashed out at me, and that we should let her rudeness slide for now. Deep down, I knew it was something bigger than that. It’s not just about teenage hormones or being rude. My daughter has a problem.
Call it mother’s intuition.

While she was at school, I entered her room and went through her stuff. The moment I opened the door, I smelled something funny. Her windows were open, and air was coming in from the outside, but the scent was still there. I couldn’t make it out at first. Maybe it was her dirty socks, rotten pizza, or stale chips. I don’t know. It was funky.
Right then and there, I texted my daughter – “Hey, girl. You have got to clean your room. It stinks.” Her reply to me was almost instant, and I didn’t like it one bit. “Get out of my room, Mom. Right now! How dare you go inside without my permission!” Wow, she was treating me so low and in utter disrespect. I called her up, and she answered with an angry “Hello!” but I beat her to it.
“Listen to me, young lady. You live in my house and you are under my care. Until you’re ready to find a place of your own, I can enter your room anytime I want and you will treat me with utmost respect. Got it?” She didn’t respond and I thought, well, that should do it. I ended the phone call.
What I found under her bed gave me chills.
And so, like any mother would do, I picked up her clothes and looked under the bed. I saw that she had jars under there. Jars? Was she keeping food under the bed???? This is the reason why the room is stinky as vomit, and it made me angrier. I said out loud, “You’re 15, Micha!”. She still doesn’t know how to clean her room!
The good things in a client’s life are often the very things that help them get better in therapy. And oddly enough, they can also be the reason that some clients don’t want to get better! — F. Diane Barth L.C.S.W.
I took one of the jars from under the bed and I almost dropped it when I saw what was inside. My hands were shaking as I pushed the bed and towards the wall which exposed all the jars beneath it. All in all, there were about 20 or so jars and it was filled with puke. My Micha was throwing up her food.
It all made sense now.
I prayed to God for help. “Please help my daughter live, dear God.” I entertained the idea that she may have an eating disorder. My baby, my child, my little angel – could she be a bulimic? I cried so hard that day and partly blamed myself for not seeing it early on. She is so thin and was hoarding jars of vomit in her room. What made her do that?
Therapy and treatment

The therapist said that my daughter has bulimia with some bouts of depression and anxiety. I didn’t hear how she got it or how she developed these disorders because all I wanted to talk about was her treatment. She was hesitant and told everyone that nothing was wrong, but I had to do something. Even if she didn’t like it, I had to decide for her. I enrolled my daughter in an eating disorder program that involved counseling for her bulimia, talk therapy for her depression and anxiety (with BetterHelp), an eating program supervised by a nutritionist, and various physical tests to check the damage done to her body.
I held her tight and told her, “You may hate me now. In fact, hate me all you want. But in time, you will realize that I’m doing this because I love you so much.”